What will you have

I know when I should not be with someone. In the aspect of I know that I would not be good for them. Nothing against me or them, just not everyone can be a fit. I would like to think in this I am wise in love.

As for knowing when someone shouldn’t be with me. That is another story all together. Anyone who has been in my blog long can attest the truth as well. 

I’ve also asked a million times, who am I? I know more now then I did before. I am a lover in a world growing cold, I am a poet in a world only knowing celebrity gossip, I am different.

I still believe in true love and I know most think it’s a school girls fantasy. Is it though? Can something pure still happen in this world? Yes, the answer is simple and complex. Would you allow something great to happen or would you let fear, bitterness, or loneliness keep you just close enough to smell the truth but never divulge in the sensational taste of love.

Will you stay for someone who can never say anything wonderful about you? Will you stay for the one who plays with your heart as if it where a rag, cleaning up their messes with your heart. 

Will you find a partner who respects you, adores you, listens to you when you’re sad. Someone who is your rock when your world is falling apart. Someone who is going to let you be all this back for them. Shared with a love so strong that storms may alter the waters but in a time of dark, each of you are your own light.

What will you decide to have?

What will I?

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Endless

I think I may be just tired and it’s getting to me, But I’ve been thinking.

And probably too much.

But I’m kind of tired of investing so much into people. People expect others to fix them or use them to blame for their selfish or harmful ways. It’s like everyone is claiming to be a saint but no one shows their colors until later. 

I know that’s life or whatever.

Then I started noticing the people who, yes may still be “broken” in some way or another, but they are out there giving the shirts off their back to all these people who don’t appreciate it. And they are all missing out on each other because they are caught up with these people. 

It’s endless.

Florida

Well I still haven’t seen Florida besides the airport to the hotel and the hotel to work. I’ve made a few new friends. Mostly I’m alone. Don’t get me wrong I totally love my own company and I don’t mind being alone usually. That’s when I’m at home and comfortable with my own things. I have the option to not be alone. When you don’t have that option it’s lonely.

Work went well. I mean I didn’t do anything and now I have to study. Seriously the book they gave me is ridiculous! It’s for sure 20 days worth of learning and I get to keep it for my store. Which means I’ll be able to train everyone correctly. Have my managers on point. 

I’m ready for my first adventure here. I’m off on Sunday’s and don’t work very late the days I do work. I want to go to the beach. Even if it’s to cold to get in, I just want my feet in the water for a moment. To be apart of something greater then myself. 

 

Reality

There are many realities throughout life. The is the one you live in, the one everyone else does (that is their individual own), and the one that none of us know. The one we don’t know is the real world. The sum of each one of us as an individually.  We make up the world. As one person it is impossible to know it. This is because we do not know the reality of the ones we are closest too, let alone the strangers of this life. It is with the philosophy of reality that this idea I have is born. When you are wanting to change the world and feel as though nothing you do will ever be good enough think of this:

If you change, no matter good or bad, the sum of the reality of the world is changed. You changed it by becoming more or less of what you were. Therefor it would change everything everywhere. We sometimes for get the importance of life and the realization that our life’s have rippling effects. Ones that go beyond our own knowledge and beyond what we think we can reach. It’s with this same thought, that I realized that I can changed it I feel about the reality I’m choosing. I choose to be in this reality. The one you have all gotten to read about. Where I felt sorry for myself, whined relentlessly, and forgot to live my life. The world reality comes to us daily but it’s how I decide to handle my reality. It’s simply interpreting things in a more positive way. It’s reaching out and touching someone with love, respect, and selflessness. Because when you stop trying to change people by force and just love them, love yourself, and just live in the present reality all things change. The world is changing.

girls only want love if its torture

It Finally happened. thats why its snowing outside. i like a taylor swift song, so thats hell freezing over out there.

At first i was a little suprised. Blank Space.

but it kind of few ways i feel right now.

…..so its gonna be forever or its gonna go down in flames. you can tell me when its over if the high was worth the pain…….

……because we’re young and we’re reckless, we’ll take this way to far it’ll leave you breathless or with a nasty scar……

im not sure i my relationship is going to last. so this is were my connective feelings for this song are coming from.

becuas it is going to last forever, or soon it may go down in flames, im not sure yet. God knows i love her and do want it to lai find things are never in our control though. not even your heart.

so with the maybes that hang in the air will leave me either breathless or with a nasty scar.

hopeful as i am i think the scar is more in my future.

what do you do as you sit and watch your relationship drain of the life it was once full of? how do you stop things you dont control? why does it always work were only one person is trying to rebuild the frame and the other lets the foundation go?

i am growing up so much, im not perfect, but i am truly trying to be a better and stronger person to control my emotions where they cant control me anymore. working on my career. making our life better.

out of left field i maybe with out her.

do you stay and find out if you are worth it? or do you leave with some kind of dignity?

find out if their love was real? of is it ne.

i dont know what to do. if we are gona last. i know its part of the chance you take when you hand someone your heart.

But is there a line when it comes to love? once that its crossed its to much, to far? and if so where do i make that line?

Down the hole

Welcome into the world of confusion.
It’s where I seem to have a permeant residince. I some times feel like I’m Alice and I’ve fallen down to a new land. Were nothing makes sense and everything is backwards. Only I was born into it.
I hate the wonder if the relationship you are in is real. Is this it? Is this love? In love do you become an equal or does someone always love more?
How do you know if someone is passing time with you? Love is easy to fake. For everyone but me.

Anything is possible

Everyone on this earth seeks and craves attention. Because we are humans and with attention of someone we find love. Love is a purpose in life. Love gives us hope and chance. You have to love others unconditionally and love yourself the same.

Only when you truly love yourself are you able to produce an infinite amount of love into the universe.
I believe everyone of us has the ability to love every person on this earth.
When love starts anything is possible.