Good Grief

I look were it tells me to put a title, right now I don’t know what to put. I dont know what it is that i want to be writing right now. I just know I want to write, that I have SO much that I want to say. More than I know how to say. I’ve been googling things that im upset about, trying to find something that will help me figure out the answer. I know there are no answers online to my problems. I guess we just live in a world were everything can be found on google. One thing Google doesn’t tell you with your endless search is that if you have to type ” i think my relationship might be over” it’s probably over. If you have read any of my constant babble in any of my post, then you know that me and T have been off and on. So many times of heart-break, disappointment. I’ve been working on myself lately, I want to reach a state of peace. I need a state of peace. Then it dawned on me that its probably that she just doesnt love me anymore. Maybe we went through too much and just broke it. I am still in love with this womans beautiful soul. I think I always will be. She has fallen out of love with me. I kept telling myself pretty little lies, ones that keep us ok and together. She doesnt love herself so how could she even love me. She is so stuck in her own problems and head now, that she doesnt even know me anymore. I feel like i share a bed with a stranger, a stranger that i strangely want to marry. I miss my best friend so much. Her body is still here everyday as we go through our life, but i am mourning the loss of my best friend. So now here I am, still trying after 5 years of ups and downs. I just dont have any strength for it. How can I find any peace, hope, or faith in such a toxic household? When will she finally be done with me or find herself again. I’m screaming again and still no one can hear me.

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It’s you and it’s me.

I wrote this
But here it is in the world.
So maybe it’ll touch someone.
Otherwise it’s useless.

It’s you and it’s me</strong>
By Bailee Skye

When the sunrises and it’s time for a new day, the first thing I see, it’s you.
But If only you could see what I do.
Only if your eyes could hold what is true.
You would see how much, my darlin, how much I really love you.

When I hold your hand,
When I kiss your lips,
When I know it’s forever
Because it’s you and it’s me.
We were meant to find love, to find a home that holds no city name,
It’s in the arms of your lover.
And baby it’s me and you.

When the worlds up against you and maybe you’re feelin a little blue
My hands right beside you, ready to hold on tight.
When the rain goes on pourin
And the thunder rolls across these plains.
I’ll be there when you wake up,
I’ll be there when you fall asleep.

When I hold your hand,
When I kiss your lips,
When I know it’s forever
Because it’s you and it’s me.
We were meant to find love,
to find a home that holds no city name,
It’s in the arms of your lover.
And baby it’s me and you.

When tomorrow seems like gloom
When the worries weigh you down.
Just remember that I’ve got you
Because it’s always me and I will always love you